50 Shades of Jazz ~ Makin’ Waves n’ Breakin’ Free ~ resurrection of the daughter ~ by Ntozake Shange. Music ~ Lonely Woman by Horace Silver

little girl and moon

These two pieces came to mind this morning.  I have survived January 20th when my tooth was filled and caused the right side of my face to swell and abscessed.  I have not been able to chew food and I can’t open my mouth wide enough for a fork to fit in.  I am going to the dentist tomorrow  Being a daughter and a lonely woman is the best way to describe how I have been feeling.  Lonely in the sense that I had to deal with my tooth malfunction all on my own.  I don’t feel sorry for myself, it is just a vista into knowing that I was a daughter to a mother and father that loved me  They didn’t compete with one another and yet they had their own unique way of dealing with life.  Mom hated the going to the dentist, I understand that very well today.  But, the Lonely I really mean solitude and being comfortable with who I am at this very moment.  So, give a listen to Horace Silvers Lonely Woman and let the Ntozake’s words soothe your soul.  Peace Out!  JBC 8-)

Horace Silver’s Lonely Woman

resurrection of the daughter  

by Ntozake Shange

the family had been ill for some time

quarantined/ socially restricted
to bridge & Sunday brunch by the pool
the mother called her daughters twice a day
she saved the son for emergencies
the father drove around a lot
there were no visible scars
under the daughters’ biba eyes
lay pain like rachel’s/ the rage of zelda
delavallades’ pirouettes in stasis
the daughters cd set a formal table
curtseys if no descendants of slaves
& speak english with no accent at all
they were virgins for a long time
one waz on punishment for a month
cuz she closed her eyes while dancin on the wrong
side of town
mama who came from there/ knew too well
a cheap pleasure cd spell remorse
for an upwardly mobile girl
& the girl learned well/ she paid for her
lovers with her suffering
never knowing some love is due you
she waved her tears in her lover’s face
the more there were/ the more they were worth
the son looked down on these things
his women did his laundry & his cooking
but they were not crying
the father waz also not crying he waz with ulcers
& waited on the cliffs
where his daughters’ lovers prayed for his demise
dyin to be the heads of a sick household
the lovers o the daughters wrought pain
deception & fear wherever they turned
& the son dept his distance
the mother called him in emergencies/ occurred all the time
the daughters believed they were ugly dumb & dark
like hades/like mud/ like beetles/ & filth

Copyright © 2011-2014 by Jannat Marie/Jazzybeatchick. All rights Reserved.

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  1. #1 by Jackie on March 11, 2014 - 2:02 am

    Take care! I hope all goes well with your tooth.


  2. #3 by Carol Balawyder on March 10, 2014 - 4:01 pm

    Great recording! Just what you need to be listening to while in the dentist’s chair:)


    • #4 by Jazzybeatchick on March 11, 2014 - 6:17 am

      That’s right on. My dentist is used to me, he likes jazz but doesn’t want to admit. It’s okay, JBC 8-)


  3. #5 by Let's CUT the Crap! on March 10, 2014 - 3:51 pm

    Sounds unadorned and forlorn. :-(


  4. #8 by Y. Prior on March 10, 2014 - 3:15 pm

    well this post really struck home because I hattttte the dentist – and well, I hope everything works out with your tooth. also – very relaxing song – enjoyed it. :)


    • #9 by Jazzybeatchick on March 11, 2014 - 6:16 am

      Me too. Thanks for your support. I go in about an hour. JBC 8-)



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