A Year of Musical Thinking ~ My Rearview Mirror ~ Prelude

My Breast Cancer Journey ~ The sea of life  2011

My Breast Cancer Journey ~ The sea of life 2011

Music is your own experience, your own thoughts, your wisdom. If you don’t live it, it won’t come out of your horn. They teach you there’s a boundary line to music. But, man, there’s no boundary line to art. Charlie Parker

Contrary to popular belief, everyone has the ability to change their circumstance, point of view and/or state of mind.  Now you say She’s must be tripping….  Well, I was skeptical about the whole change your mind and change your life thing, too.  Breast cancer changed my life.  Making me question my thoughts; re-examine my beliefs and why I was so unhappy.  The prelude to living a life with cancer began after my mastectomy that was riddled with several complications.  I was gasping for air.  Then chemotherapy was introduced.  I discovered that if I was going to make it through this ordeal I had to look through the rearview mirror that took me back to the 1960’s.  I desperately wanted to live with music again and not die with the noise of surgeries, chemotherapy, loss, betrayal and everything that was happening to me.  That being said, this was by no means something that could change overnight.  It meant to go back to my fondest memories and the lessons dad taught me through jazz.  Confucius says Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without.  I had to get rid of all of my attachments to outcomes and material things because quite honestly, they didn’t mean much.  Never did.  Dad died six years earlier and mom’s cancer returned after so many years.  It was just us.  My friends found it hard to talk to me.  They simply didn’t know what to do or say.  At the time, I was angry and frustrated about everything.  I wanted to give up.  It really began in November of 2000.  Is there an event that brought you to the shores of life?  What began to make sense and how did it transform your life.  For me, it was Jazz with all the trimmings.  JBC 8-)

“A Patch Of Blue (2007 Digital Remaster) (Feat. James Moody)” from Dizzy Gillespie & James Moody With Gil Fuller & The Monterey Jazz Festival Orchestra by Gil Fuller & The Monterey Jazz Festival Orchestra Featuring James Moody. Released: 2008.

I remember the first time I heard this song.  Logline:  A blind, uneducated white girl is befriended by a black man, who becomes determined to help her escape her impoverished and abusive home life.  The opening note sets the tonality and timbre of life back then.  Listen to the way the notes transforms the soul of society and gracefully introduces the beauty and glory that jazz brought to a fractured and wounded society.  What do you hear?

Copyright © 2011-2014 by Jannat Marie/Jazzybeatchick. All rights Reserved.

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  1. #1 by Hetterbell on February 20, 2014 - 6:40 am

    It certainly sounds like it was a very difficult time. I admire your courage and it’s great that you came through all this, and stronger, too.


    • #2 by Jazzybeatchick on February 20, 2014 - 6:49 am

      Thank you so much. I am integrating into my life, some days are easier said then done, but God’s grace and mercy pave the way. JBC 8-)


  2. #3 by Let's CUT the Crap! on February 19, 2014 - 4:23 pm

    I l.i.k.e. the old recordings. I remember the movie and wasn’t it Sidney Portier as the main character? Enjoyed that movie. It s.a.i.d. something about who we are, not who we are not: human, caring.
    Hm. A health scare also made me rethink my life and eventually leave my husband because the environment was not conducive to good health and we had a daughter.


    • #4 by Jazzybeatchick on February 19, 2014 - 4:53 pm

      Yes indeed it was Sidney Portier as the main character. It was the summer of ’65 when it dropped into the theaters. We went to see it at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre now the Chinese Theater. Walk of the stars. Health seems to be the tipping point and major game changer. We are all better off in the end Thanks for sharing. JBC 8-)


  3. #8 by navigator1965 on February 19, 2014 - 2:39 pm

    I’ll defer answering the question for a month or two, JBC. };-)>


  4. #10 by El Guapo on February 19, 2014 - 10:01 am

    Wow! That song is incredible!
    Glad to hear you carried on with your transformation after breast cancer.


    • #11 by Jazzybeatchick on February 19, 2014 - 4:49 pm

      Thank you. My dad did the arrangement for Moody. I was mesmerized and enchanted when hearing different parts of the song on the piano downstairs to hearing it take form in the studio and alighting on stage. A surreal metamorphosis. Thanks for sharing. JBC 8-)



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